Monday, May 29, 2006
Announcement: Sana Is Joining The Effin Abbey
So, according to mutual friend, Jester is off the market.
Why? Something about a being in a weird emotional place or summat.
Am I upset?
No.
Upset is too strong a word.
Let's look for a softer word, shall we, seeing as how now I've started this I'm going to have to continue for at least a quarter of a page or lose my reputation as the world's longest blogger of crap.
Disappointed? No. My hopes were never that high.
Disillusioned? Sounds a bit better, but still not quite on the mark.
The best way, and how tragically ironic, to describe how I feel right now....
Would be to say I'm in a weird emotional place right now.
A few posts ago, I mentioned something about how I was terrified of ending up alone because I'm too picky. It's all well and good, and has become second nature to me, to imMEDIATELY vacate all thoughts like that and fill that void with positive, happyshinyfecker thoughts of "Oh, at the end of the day, Sana will find what she's REALLY looking for!!!!!!" and "Well, at least I'm not settling" and "I miss out on nothing" and "At least emotional damage evades me!"
I wonder if Jester's emotionally damaged.
HAPPYSHINYFECKERTHOUGHTS,HAPPYSHINYFECKERTHOUGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At the end of the day, somewhere in the mass of calculated logic....is a flaw. And I don't know where that is. Because calculated logic is what LEADS Sana to HappyLand, where all negative thoughts are banished to the land of Those Other Normal People.
And yet, I can't seem to get there anymore. Is it because I'm losing optimism or am I just having trouble settling down? Or is it just that I miss being, not just a part of things, but right in the centre, where things may not revolve around me, but I KNOW what's happening?
BANISH THOSE THOUGHTS, SANA!!! For somewhere along the line, someone is GOING to EVENTUALLY realize the wonder that is me and....and....
Urgh.
I sound false even to me now. That was a point I should have never reached. And never expected to reach. And now that I've reached it, I don't quite know what to do with myself.
BEING A NUN, YEAH, BEING A NUN IS NO FUN.
Haahaaa, Sana made a rhymie.
Go away.
Why? Something about a being in a weird emotional place or summat.
Am I upset?
No.
Upset is too strong a word.
Let's look for a softer word, shall we, seeing as how now I've started this I'm going to have to continue for at least a quarter of a page or lose my reputation as the world's longest blogger of crap.
Disappointed? No. My hopes were never that high.
Disillusioned? Sounds a bit better, but still not quite on the mark.
The best way, and how tragically ironic, to describe how I feel right now....
Would be to say I'm in a weird emotional place right now.
A few posts ago, I mentioned something about how I was terrified of ending up alone because I'm too picky. It's all well and good, and has become second nature to me, to imMEDIATELY vacate all thoughts like that and fill that void with positive, happyshinyfecker thoughts of "Oh, at the end of the day, Sana will find what she's REALLY looking for!!!!!!" and "Well, at least I'm not settling" and "I miss out on nothing" and "At least emotional damage evades me!"
I wonder if Jester's emotionally damaged.
HAPPYSHINYFECKERTHOUGHTS,HAPPYSHINYFECKERTHOUGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At the end of the day, somewhere in the mass of calculated logic....is a flaw. And I don't know where that is. Because calculated logic is what LEADS Sana to HappyLand, where all negative thoughts are banished to the land of Those Other Normal People.
And yet, I can't seem to get there anymore. Is it because I'm losing optimism or am I just having trouble settling down? Or is it just that I miss being, not just a part of things, but right in the centre, where things may not revolve around me, but I KNOW what's happening?
BANISH THOSE THOUGHTS, SANA!!! For somewhere along the line, someone is GOING to EVENTUALLY realize the wonder that is me and....and....
Urgh.
I sound false even to me now. That was a point I should have never reached. And never expected to reach. And now that I've reached it, I don't quite know what to do with myself.
BEING A NUN, YEAH, BEING A NUN IS NO FUN.
Haahaaa, Sana made a rhymie.
Go away.
Queen Sana at 8:44 PM
