I am a CHILD:

- I want attention: yours.
- I want praise for things that don't deserve it.
- I can be a bitch or a jerk, but give me some time: it's very likely I'll grow out of it.
- Mud is more fun than dolls.
- Dolls are more fun than homework.
- Homework is more fun than church.
- Church is more fun than....um....
- Don't psychoanalyze my actions: maybe I pushed the fat kid just because everyone else was. It's NOT because I have a low self esteem, it's NOT because I am lashing out for lack of love, it IS because I am too young to understand the concept of consequence.
- And yes, we ALL push the fat kid or the dumb kid or the immigrant kid: again, we don't think.
- And no, I don't believe I've scarred the fat kid for life. Don't tell me I have, because I won't sleep again.
- The kids who make it out of playschool, preschool and primary school are the ones who stood up for themselves on the playground, NOT the ones who were patient and "ignored" us.
- I think everything I do is worth your time and energy. Let me believe this for a while.
- If I have a crush on you, I won't admit it. This is because I think I'm in love.

I am a TEENAGER:

- Everything I do is right, and don't tell me otherwise.
- I want your trust even if I don't deserve it.
- Don't expect things, because it hurts so much when I let you down.
- I WILL listen to bad music if everyone else is.
- I WILL listen to bad music if everyone else ISN'T, just to prove how totally unique my mad music listening skills are.
- I'm often doing something totally innocent when you think I'm doing something wrong.
- I'm often doing something wrong when you think I'm doing something totally innocent.
- I bitch about you to everyone, but I'm still nice to you.
- I know YOU bitch about ME to everyone, but I'm still nice to you.
- If I have a crush on you, I WILL call it love. I will tell everyone I knew it WASN'T actually love, but this is only half true: I was secretly hoping.
- I am terrified of ending up alone.
- I don't know why I'm nice to the popular kids. If I AM a popular kid, I don't know why I'm not nice to the rejects.
- If I AM nice to the rejects, don't worry about me: I am a genuinely good human being and I will stay that way.
- I wish I was older, all the time.

I am an ADULT:

- I wish I was younger, all the time.
- I try so hard to live vicariously through you. I'll tell you it's because I care. The truth is, I'm trying to prove myself right.
- I hate it when I let you down, because I don't want you to think any less of me till you actually have to.
- You frustrate me SO much more than I let on.
- Experience DOES count.
- I want you to listen to me for one reason: your own kids will NEVER respect you if you did things you won't let THEM do. I'm willing to sacrifice YOUR respect for me for your sake.
- I am passive aggressive and I WILL stoop very low: you just can't see it because you're shorter than me.
- I am so very proud of your achievements, and I want you to know that, every day.
- I don't tell you I love you every time I feel it, because you'll think I'm mushy and dependent.
- I am mushy and dependent, and when you leave the house, I will wander around feeling completely purposeless.
- I make just as many mistakes as you do, but we're BOTH selfish and wrapped up in our own problems.....I can see yours because I've had them before, but you'll have to wait a bit to see mine.
- When I say sorry, what I mean is, "I've failed you, but please let me prove that I can actually be there for you."

Queen Sana at 6:16 AM