Instead of respond directly to you, I will do so here as a series of dot points.

- Don't flatter yourself: my poetry has never been inspired by you. The fact that my BLOG is on occasion means, of course, a great deal. The guys I like have been in my blogs. Random strangers that inspire me have been in my blogs. My friends, my exams, my activities, my booklists, my pet peeves......

Did I say a great deal? I mean very, very, very, very little.

Also, I don't appreciate the mocking tone you said it in. Every single feeling I detailed I stand by. The fact that I have a great self esteem in every aspect of my life except my body image is very telling of you as parents. I can recall specific events, can you?

- Rather than do what I've done every other time (and they have been numerous), I'd like to try something different. Jumping into big weight loss strategies, going exercise freak etc. have not worked for me before, hence the reason I'm starting with lifestyle changes and eating habits.

Again, something I won't tell you because you won't listen.

- Male parent, the fact that I'm not arguing with you appears to have gotten to you. This gives me ENDLESS enjoyment, because it allows me to witness just how far you will go to make me see your oft-repeated point.

I am not a retard. I am ACTUALLY quite intelligent. Please do not treat me like one. I am, in fact, not 12 anymore. I am 17, and you simply can NOT tell a 17 year old how to do her HAIR. It is irritating that you find the need to keep condescendingly bringing it up. I do not appreciate it.

- No, I'm not going to tie my hair up, AGAIN for reasons that I will not explain to YOU because you appear slightly dense.....it is because during my exams, I got so nervous and panicky that I single-handedly receded my own hairline (trichotylomania, read up on it) by plucking it out constantly. When I tie it up, it looks ridiculous because it is SO very noticeable.

Oh, and the fact that I know how much it annoys you. I wish it didn't, it really does look rather nice. You appear to take offense at rather dumb things....that is your problem, however, not mine.

- Mom, you're not a nice person. That's all I'm going to say for this point, but it is potent. I'm rather disappointed that you feel the need to resort, yet again, to scare slash shock tactics when again, as I've said, I AM AN INTELLIGENT CHILD! YOU CAN DISCUSS THINGS WITH ME! AS LONG AS THEY ARE REASONABLE, I WILL LISTEN!

Oh dear, that's ME treating YOU like the moron now....sorry, learned habit perhaps?

- May I also say, for the record, that I don't appreciate being made to feel like an awful child. As my wardrobe consists of kurtas with pretty patterns and nothing lownecked, my bookshelf is full of literary classics, my study table is covered in certificates and awards that I have to sort out chronologically, my habits are healthy, I don't overspend on anything and I am quite well adjusted, I'd like to request that you leave me alone.

I write in clinical, detached and cynical tone when I'm trying to cover up an urge to cry. I'm not going to cry, though, because of this final point:

- I'm leaving you in less than three months....off to university. Oh, that merciful place. I hope I miss you, I really do. And I'm certain I will, ya know....maybe I just AM a horrible child who takes you for granted at every opportunity. No, no matter how jokingly you say it, I don't want to see you every week. I really don't.

I think that in order for BOTH of us to appreciate how awesome the other is, we just need time far, far, far away from each other. However, I have no doubt that the very second I get back, you'll find some other way to make me feel like an awful person.

What a truly wonderful claim to fame, and bravo on that.

Queen Sana at 7:11 PM